an excerpt

(after the tsunami in southeast asia..)
the phone numbers of aid organizations would skitter across the bottom of the tv screen, and i recall thinking that if they wanted serious donations, they should have shown a puppy. just one was all it would have taken. it could have been sleeping, its belly full of the malnourished children we'd seen on the previous night's broadcast, but none of that would have mattered. people who had never before contributed to charity emptied their pockets when a cocker spaniel was shown standing on a rooftop after hurricane katrina. "what choice did i have." they asked. "that poor little thing looked into the camera and penetrated my very soul."

the eyes of the stranded grandmother, i noted, were not half as piercing. there she was, clinging to a chimney with her bra strap showing, and all anyone did was wonder if she had a dog. "i'd hate to think there's a scottie in her house, maybe trapped on the first floor. what's the number of that canine rescue agency?"

the sight of an iguana sailing down the street on top of a refrigerator sent a herpetologist friend over the edge. "she seems to be saying, 'where's my master?'" he speculated. "here it is, time for our daily cuddle, and i'm stuck on the SS Whirlpool!!!"

i giggle on the train alot because of this man.